Co-parenting with an NPD: Things You’ll Never Hear

  1. I’ll pick up the children for their normal weekly visitation at the court-designated time and place. And drop them off at the court-designated time and place.
  2. Your holiday plans sound fine. I will pick up the children and drop them off at the court-designated time and place.
  3. Those sports teams sound good. I agree.
  4. Those camps sound good. I agree.
  5. Your babysitter sounds great. I agree.
  6. I will pay half of the children’s tuition.
  7. I have sent back all of the children’s clothing that you purchased.
  8. I have purchased sports equipment so our children won’t have to lug it from house to school to house.
  9. Great, thank you for setting up a shared calendar. I will use it!
  10. I deposited my children’s support check in the bank account on time.
  11. I will contribute to my children’s college accounts.
  12. Thank you.
  13. I’m sorry.
  14. That sounds reasonable.
  15. Yes.

I know I’m missing some! Does anyone have anything to add?


15 thoughts on “Co-parenting with an NPD: Things You’ll Never Hear

  1. * You’re right.
    * No problem.
    * Please…
    * I noticed the kids need _____, I’ll cover the cost, don’t worry about it.
    * We can work it out. I’m flexible.

  2. I LOVE this!

    – I would be happy to have them showered, with hair and teeth brushed, and fed breakfast before they go to school.
    – I would love to take the afternoon from work so you don’t have to for the orthodontist appointment
    – I will absolutely be at the dance recital/music concert/football game/graduation ceremony to support our child

    I could go on and on…FANTASTIC stuff! Good for you, I needed the laugh today. Thanks!

      • It never ceases to amaze me, that those with NPD – who despise any notion they are anything like other people – are so completely predictable and the same as every other NPD. The irony hurts. It is good that people who have lived with them find each other, because there is very little support amongst people who have never experienced the pain of living with one.

      • You said this perfectly. Also, I don’t tell most people about the NPD. They would think I’m crazy or making it up. Lately, I just try to manage the worst of it and ignore the rest and not talk about it. I worry about my children being exposed to it, and I wonder when they will realize that their father is such an incredible, malicious mess.

      • My son is 9. He figured it out a few months before his 9th birthday. I was surprised it was this early, but I’ve read they typically become aware in grade school.

    • Narcissist dad is good! But it really means Narcissistic Personality Disorder – basically someone whose narcissistic traits make them unable to feel remorse or empathy for anyone except themselves. I feel you when you say your ex contributes nothing but stress. You can google NPD and look at the checklists of symptoms.

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